My page contains the world's largest (although size isn't everything it does matter) list of chat up lines (pick up lines, to People in other parts of the world), and many other funny jokes and some very humorous stuff. The jokes on this page are recommended for people who are grown up and consider that they are a adult. I am not putting a age check on this page, so anybody 'could' read it, but I am not holding a gun to your head either, so if you are easily offended please read the pages and just ignore words like "Fuck", "Sex", "Bastard" and other swear words, or I suppose you could Piss off now! People from all over the have sent me some of the jokes and Pick up lines on these pages, and many people have commented about my page. I would like to thank all of these people, and I do write back to every E-Mail personally. Although I can't thank people individually on my web pages my heart does thank them all! I even reply to all the 'fake' emails I get! Thanks for Passing on the URL so everybody else can take a look at my pages. Thanks to people who I have Meet at work who have bothered to take a look at my pages, and all the Students from Bradford University! I showed a print out of some of my pages, to the door staff at my local Casino, and they found the Pick Up lines very funny.... One of my personal Favorites, which has been sent to me is "You're so beautiful, I can't believe God didn't keep you for himself."!!!! As you can guess I like the romantic lines, but the crude lines also appeal to me too!!! Another of my best ones is "Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down, go ahead say no.". I am always on the look out for more lines, and rejections, so if you have any funny storys, please feel free to send them to me!

Now we have all the Mary Whitehouse fans out of the way, we can get on with the real stuff. Please note though that this page contains no nude images (not even of me - although I get so many begging letters from my female fans around the world), and will not in the future, but does contain sexual swear words, like 'fuck' and stuff.... But remember that there are worse words in the dictionary than 'Fuck' and 'Bastard', like the word 'Stab', and I am sure that we all prefer to get 'Fucked' than to a get 'Stabbed'!